Creativity and Influence

Human Design (HD) is a garbage pile of trash that could arguably tell you more about yourself than a natal chart ever could. No, it's wonderful, I'm just mad that it told me more about myself than I've learned in 29 years. If you haven’t done a natal chart, I’d highly recommend starting there, as HD was overwhelming when I first looked at it, and I even had a guide! HD uses the same basic biographical information as natal charts, but then takes this genetic information into the body and chakras with a different vein of research. You can get your free chart here; you'll need your exact time, date, and place of birth. It's gonna look something like this. 



My beautiful, intelligent, expanse of a human being partner and I were doing a little excavation of meaning from our charts by skipping around in Human Design by Lynda Bunnell and Ra Uru Hu. Fun fact, Wendell and I are both Generators. 💗

The major questions that came out of my exploration of charts with my beautiful, intelligent, expanse of a human being partner were: 

1) When will Kara start to run shit (i.e. wield Influence)?

My answer: “Hilarious! I don’t want to be in charge of anything! I just want people to be able to increase self awareness and attunement by learning from their experiences and, ooohhh....”. 
Hi, Hello. That’s not what I’m trying to do as a therapist or anything. But, also! When will Kara start to be confident in her ability to provide the safe space that empowers others to realize their potential? The third person here can go take a hike because I don’t know, and I’m uncomfortable. I imagine this discomfort will divulge her secrets in time. 

Don’t worry about 2). That’s my own to possibly share in the ish near future. 

3) How will Kara increase Creativity within her sphere (both generating her own creativity and empowering others to be more creative)?  

Well, the easiest first step I could take was to start writing and using some kind of platform to do so. I’ve always felt I had a knack for good writing, so now I have to figure out the creative aspect of it. The first thing that comes to mind is creating a coherent narrative around the experiences I’ve had - experiences that largely stemmed from me making choices without consulting my gut. Most of my adult traumas have been due to my own choices; very rarely have things just spontaneously happened to me. In talking with a friend awhile back, I remember commenting, “Literally what could happen to me that hasn’t already happened?” *knock on wood* Maybe I'm just hard-headed and have to learn my lessons "the hard way" or maybe I am fulfilling a destiny of becoming a wise old sage. Or maybe I'll just be a cautionary tale. 


The point is, I’ve learned a lot of lessons and I’d like to have fun sharing those stories, even if I do embarrass myself, in the hopes that somebody can relate to how I’ve felt. I no longer feel the need to hide away because I should somehow be ashamed of the life I've created. To be fair, I didn't follow the trajectory that was laid out for me in my ultra-conservative background, and that was probably disappointing for the people whose narrative for me was being a dutiful young wife and mother. It's a beautiful path; but it's not the one I wanted, and I don't need to legitimize my path to anyone. I get to decide what it means to have lived a good life. 

So, yes, this post is out of nowhere, but it will be the planted flag around which I would like to build a space for a) personal growth and exploration, b) letting others get to know me a little better, c) opening up dialogue for sharing experiences, and d) keeping myself occupied during COVID-19. For my fellow novice bloggers, what would you like to see me struggle through writing about?

Thank you for reading!

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